Outlining: A Long Vacation

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Outlining: A Long Vacation

Remember:

A thesis or a topic sentence must sound more like a conclusion than like an introduction.
A topic sentence must set up one logical sub-division of the thesis.
The topic sentences must be organized around one basis of sub-division. They should not overlap.
Following are four choices for the thesis sentence for a theme about a Florida family’s two-week vacation to New England. Pick the best choice. The other three are poor thesis sentences.

  1. Vacations never work out the way you plan them to.
  2. After much research and many arguments, my family decided to drive to New England for a vacation.
  3. Our family vacation to New England was disappointing.
  4. Driving to New England for a vacation was quite an experience.

Following are four choices for the topic sentence of the first paragraph of development. Pick the best choice. The other three are poor topic sentences or do not fit the pattern.

  1. We started out at 8 a.m. Saturday morning after considerable trouble packing everything into the car.
  2. Before we drove 200 miles, we had to call AAA because our car overheated.
  3. Deciding to travel by car was a mistake.
  4. Everything went wrong from transportation to lodging to entertainment.

Following are four choices for the topic sentence of the second paragraph of development. Pick the best choice. The other three are poor topic sentences or do not fit the pattern.

  1. After checking in to the Holiday Inn in Nantucket, I had the worst meal of my life.
  2. Our motel rooms and meals were sub-standard and overpriced.
  3. After a long three-day drive we finally arrived at our vacation resort, a Holiday Inn on Nantucket Island.
  4. Although the facilities and services at our Holiday Inn were disappointing, the staff there made a fine effort to compensate.

Following are four choices for the topic sentence of the third paragraph of development (the last middle paragraph not the concluding paragraph). Pick the best choice. The other three are poor-topic sentences or do not fit the pattern.

  1. This vacation was definitely the worst of my life.
  2. Then there were even more disappointments.
  3. Bad weather spoiled most of our recreational activities.
  4. Our Saturday morning boat charter for lobster hunting and deep sea fishing was a big bust.

Answers

Following are four choices for the thesis sentence for a theme about a vacation to New England. Pick the best choice. The other three are poor thesis sentences.

  1. Vacations never work out the way you plan them to. This is a useless introductory overstatement. The paper is about one vacation.
  2. After much research and many arguments, my family decided to drive to New England for a vacation. If the focus will be on the planning, then the research and the arguments should be at the end of the sentence for emphasis.
  3. Our family vacation to New England was disappointing.
  4. Driving to New England for a vacation was quite an experience. Experiences can be good or bad. This is simply an excuse to tell about the trip.

Following are four choices for the topic sentence of the first paragraph of development. Pick the best choice. The other three are poor topic sentences or do not fit the pattern.

  1. We started out at 8 a.m. Saturday morning after considerable trouble packing everything into the car. A short paper about a two week trip cannot waste an entire paragraph on packing the car.
  2. Before we drove 200 miles, we had to call AAA because our car overheated. This is a fact. This should be one example in a paragraph of many driving troubles.
  3. Deciding to travel by car was a mistake.
  4. Everything went wrong on our trip from transportation to lodging to entertainment. This would be a fine thesis sentence with one main idea and a summary of the organization, but it has too many opinions to be a topic sentence.

Following are four choices for the topic sentence of the second paragraph of development. Pick the best choice. The other three are poor topic sentences or do not fit the pattern.

  1. After checking in to the Holiday Inn in Nantucket, I had the worst meal of my life. A short paper about a two week trip cannot waste an entire paragraph on one bad meal unless it resulted in food poisoning and an extended hospital stay, which this sentence does not prepare readers for.
  2. Our hotel room and meals were sub-standard and overpriced. This seems like two ideas, but since it refers to one experience of lodging at a resort hotel it is okay.
  3. After a long three-day drive we finally arrived at our vacation resort, a Holiday Inn on Nantucket Island. This long transition does not give a focus for the paragraph.
  4. Although the facilities and services at our Holiday Inn were disappointing, the staff there made a fine effort to compensate. This could fit the pattern if disappointing came at the end of the sentence. The paper is accenting the negative.

Following are four choices for the topic sentence of the third paragraph of development (the last middle paragraph not the concluding paragraph). Pick the best choice. The other three are poor-topic sentences or do not fit the pattern.

  1. This vacation was definitely the worst of my life. A topic sentence cannot repeat and overstate the thesis.
  2. Then there were even more disappointments. This establishes no logical group.
  3. Bad weather spoiled most of our recreational activities.
  4. Our Saturday morning boat charter for lobster hunting and deep sea fishing was a big bust. This should be one incident in a paragraph about many spoiled excursions.

Last updated 11/15/2007